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The Two Sides of Me


This is me

This is me

I'm not sure if the two me's overlap, or if they are completely different?


Part of me has a life. 


I sew.
I model.
I read.
I write (and have manuscripts to prove it).
I have friends (and spend time with them. At least long enough for a selfie).
I have family.
I always have something big happening, normally more than one thing at a time.
And my clothes are very . . . shall we say artistic?
Mostly I smile, but sometimes I share about pain, or my Dad being in a car accident and nearly dying, or rocky friendships, or stress. I have a colorful life, and the colors spread from pink to black, to all the shades between.
Overall, when you see me you see an unending variety of life.

Part of me has no life . . . 
. . . Yet, that part of me seems to be obsessed with mirrors and smiling and cleaning.
EVERYTHING is clean.
My humor is clean.
My singing is clean (and the toilet brush is my mic).
My friends are clean.
My day is clean. 
I walk to work because that keeps my body clean.
I'm always, ALWAYS, always cleaning.
Except my clothes are atrocious. Too big. UGLY. But at least they are of a clean fashion.
This is my everyday life. 

Even my satire is some sort of twisted cleaner's lingo.

Question: What do you call a cleaner's ex?
Answer: A dirt bag.

Acceptable marriage proposal: Will you clean only my house forever? Be my house cleaner.


Having two Instagrams and keeping them both active actually isn't that hard. 
And, all joking aside, I don't feel like two different people. I don't feel like I have no life vs have too much life. 
I love all of my life. 
Even though I rarely talk about my work on my regular page and rarely talk about my life/ writing on my cleaning page, I don't feel like I have a split personality. 
Not really. 
Though . . . sometimes I wonder? 
Because I never have to think about which post belongs on which page . . . 
I know where the different sides of me belong. 
Is that weird? 


Do you ever feel like there's more than one side to who you are? If so, I don't think that's bad. Just think about it . . . we humans are too complicated to be just one thing. The more alive we are the more there is to us. In fact, I believe all of us have hundreds and hundreds of sides. And that's why identity is so complicated. We like things simplified—but how can we be simplified with a single word when there's so much to who we are? 

Also, if you don't follow me on either of my Instagrams, feel free to add me! Because the pictures are so fun, yes? 

P.S. I have no idea when I wrote this post, but it's been waiting for a long time to be posted. But since I wrote it, I've stumbled across this fun Instagram post that really summarizes up the heart of what I'm saying here. Enjoy!


Comments

  1. This was very interesting! I love how you're saying you can be yourself but have various personalities at the same time!

    I'm definitely that way, though I rarely come out of one personality unless I know someone well. Then I'm like this rainbow of colors, and it's all crazy and great because it's me and God made me (and everyone else!) To be as diverse as they can possibly be.

    Love this post!!

    ~ Lily Cat (Boots) | lilycatscountrygirlconfessions.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. We really are various. Like I said recently to a friend, we are a cancel radiating light and those around us can only see different rays and so it's like there's more than one of us because all of the rays make us up.

      And I think that as you grow older and hang out with more good people those rainbow colors will shine more. . That's how it's been with me at least 😂 thanks for your lovely thoughts!

      Delete
  2. Love this! I don't think you have a split personality at all, I think you have a very full life with several very different and very well-polished facets which, though in some ways very different from each other, are in no way incompatible. :D If a girl's only paying attention to one part of her life, she's got a problem, right?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Haha yeah I don't feel like I have a split personality either. Though I've been realizing lately that's it's very possible to be super excited about one thing and very stresses out about another thing all at once.
      You're so right! Gotta focus on more than one thing... woman after all habe a reputation of multitasking to keep up ;)

      Delete
  3. I relate to this so much! I always feel like different people bring out different sides in me, thankfully mostly good sides so far :p

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Just WAIT until you meet the people that bring out your bad sides ;) just kidding, Haha! Thanks!

      Delete
  4. I do feel like that sometimes, more than one side.... it's so complicated.... guess you just got to love every side. Lol

    astordetective.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  5. I feel a bit multidimensional at times. So I relate to this!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Haha it can be a scary feeling ... until you embrace it;)

      Delete
  6. *laugh* Yeah, I know what you mean. I couple of months ago I went through an identity crisis because I saw all the things that were different about me in different places and I was trying to figure out which one was ME... ended up, all of them are in a way. xD

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think this is why so many have so called identity crisis. I mean, it's real ... but for most of us we just have to realize we are human and impossible to be put in a box. So glad you figured it out ;)

      Delete

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